Dear Chronic Lyme Disease:
There so much I don’t know about you on a medical, political and environmental level and yet so much I have already learned in just a little over two months. You have lived with me a long time but I was unaware as it feels like you have been hiding in my attic and secretly watching and taking over my life and my power. So when they finally discovered you, I welcomed the “label and diagnosis” - but not you – sorry. I was relieved to have a name for all the symptoms. I welcomed possibly finding some answers. The relief was short lived as soon the so called “reality” sunk in.
Many years ago I was fortunate enough to speak on the telephone with the best selling author of many books on Mind Body Medicine, Dr. Bernie Siegel. I teasingly told him he owed me a commission as I had referred so many people to his books, DVD’s and CD’s. I have practiced what I have preached over the years and have taken “healing intervals” throughout the day. I start my days with meditation, walks in nature with my dog, exercise and I do daily Reiki, affirmations and many other things for self care. But now I am too tired in the morning to walk. It takes me until 3 pm most days to walk and/or do some type of exercises and that is limited due to joint and muscle range of motion issues with Lyme. Meditation – ahh…no problem there. That is all I want to do. But that doesn’t help with getting other things done in my life. So you have turned thing upside down. Living with physical pain is one thing. I can meditate and do body scans and do Reiki and hypnotize myself all day long for relief. But how am I suppose to live my life like that? Finding a new “normal” was a real challenge. What do I do with a new daily life where most of the day is like being at an Omega Rest and Relaxation Retreat in Rhinebeck, New York?
What – Did I really write that? Wait a minute. It isn’t that life is a breeze now. Living with you is very hard and very painful on many levels. What I mean by the new R and R is that learning to heal and live with you, I have no choice now but to listen to my body. It is speaking very Loud and Clear. If I want to feel peace, health and healing I must put everything I know about healing and more into practice. It wasn’t that long ago that I had lunch with a dear, wise friend from my old hospice days. We talked about what was going on in our lives and at one point she asked me, “If you could do anything in the world with no limitations what would you do?” I sat there grinning and a silent conversation went on in my head. My monster ego, as John Edwards calls it, was thinking “Oh my, she remembers me asking that questions in one of my workshops and it stuck with her and she just forgot she heard it from me.” I soon caught myself being wrapped up in ego and just let it go and before I knew what was coming out of my mouth I said the word “Nothing.”
I shocked myself more than I did my friend. My usual response would have been “Exactly what I am doing now as I love what I am doing.” In fact in my next breath I continued on and said. “I would do what I am doing now as I love what I am doing but I guess I surprised myself and you with saying nothing because I know what I need to do right now is what my body is telling me that I need to do. I need to slow down more. I thought I did a lot of self care and I did – more than most people I know. But it is time for me to focus more on healing some things I put aside so that I could help others. It is time for me to clean the corners that I thought were cleaned but need some extra touch ups. It doesn’t mean I will stop what I love doing and being of service. It means that my priority right now is a different focus.”
In Wayne Dyers interview about his healing with John of God he talks about his belief that illness is preceded by our energy bodies. All illness is nothing more than our body’s way of healing and responding to things or issues we need to clear. For Dyer it meant traumas or relationships from the past. In 2012 many people are finding issues – physical, emotional and spiritual - intensifies as we clear our energy and physical bodies for the new transformations. So things may intensify for awhile. Some call it the “Ascension Symptoms.” It is what we do with this process that makes all the difference. What we learn and how we find the “bless in the mess”. For Wayne it was through his healing with John of God – see link below and his wonderful interview.
When Louise Hays came down with a diagnosis of Cancer her response was that now she was given an opportunity to put into practice more what she taught.” As you know Dear Lyme, you may find it strange that when I take my Byron White formulas to fight the co-infections, I say a “Thank You.” As I swallow the formulas I acknowledge and I am grateful for what you have taught me. I am grateful that now you have gone and left my body and I am healed. As I visualize myself healed and see this more clearly every day and I know my reality will manifest. Since some days I may get fatigued, I will sit and watch this YouTube link by Gregg Braden on How To Pray over and over as a reminder of this reality.
When I ask myself “why me” my higher self responds with the knowledge that I can not appreciate the wonders and glories of the sunsets and the majesty of the mountains if I don’t at some point visit the darkness of the valley. When I have done this in the past I have always returned more alive, more hopeful, more blessed. Perhaps this will be the last time in this incarnation that I visit the valley. But I don’t know and that right now is something that I will also learn to embrace. Along the way I will share Light, Love and Healing.
I am Light
I am Love
I am Grateful for My Healing
Thought for the Month
Crystal Bowls August 16th 7 p.m.
Drumming Circle Second Saturday of the Month
Intro to Astrology Oct. 13th 10 - 2
Past Life Regression August 23rd 6:30 p.m.
Private Angel Card Readings and Workshops